Friday, February 10, 2012

I Hassa Go

OK…so here’s how it went down. My wife and I were watching our daughter’s two little boys. The oldest is two and a half and the young one is nine months. Now, the two and half year old is currently an amateur potty trainee. He hasn’t gone pro yet, but he’s close. This however, was a moment of…not that close. He was in the living room coloring when I heard, “Gwampa, I hassa go poop!” I’m quoting verbatim here. So, I hustled him into the small half bath next to the kitchen. Having some experience at this I deftly got his pants and big boy undies down about half way. That’s the point when I realized the “Hassa go” was actually “Hassa went”. So, I held him up and out at arm’s length so as not to spread the joy around. The “Hassa went” immediately deposited itself on the bathroom floor. So, here I am holding this little boy out at arm’s length, poopy pants half way down and no where to put him that won’t complicate the matter. I looked to my wife for a little help here. She’s holding the nine month old …and convulsing in laughter. The two and a half year old decides he’d really like to see what’s so funny and starts twisting around to get a look at what’s going on down below. This is where you have to remember the half way down poopy pants part and the fact that this is a very small half bath. Now, while I did manage to keep any further deposits from a twisty two and a half year old off the wallpaper, towel rack and light switch…in my maneuvers I did manage to step in the “Hassa went” already on the floor. My wife thought this too was quite funny. She finally did stop laughing long enough to put the nine month old down on the kitchen floor and take the two and a half year old off for a thorough sanitization. And there I stood…poopy pants and undies in hand…standing in some ”Hassa went”…sharing a moment with the nine month old. Who I must say seemed totally unfazed by the whole chain of events as he sat there calmly on the kitchen floor…eating the dog’s food. True story.

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