Cute...I don't think so

My wife gave me a new hat this Christmas. It’s…well…an interesting hat. It has a real Norwegian look to it. She thought it would keep help my ears warm while I am out blowing the snow…or herding reindeer in Greenland. Like I said, it’s an interesting hat. So, the other day it snowed and knowing that the reindeer herding responsibilities for that day in Greenland were probably covered, I put it on to go blow some snow around the driveway here. As I passed my wife to head out the door she said “Don’t you look cute”. And it cut like knife. Now I am a Grandpa and while quite often, older people such as Grandpas in reindeer herding hats are referred to as being…cute, this Grandpa is not at all ready to be referred to as being cute. Handsome…rugged…experienced…even older reindeer herder sure…but cute…I don’t think so. In fact, don’t even refer to me as an older person. Make it older guy. Because older guys are younger and never cute. I’d still like to think I could suck my belly in…walk into a room and maybe turn at least one head. I’d still like think maybe someone might refer to me as being hot… or at least very warm. Cute…I don’t think so. Now, while I will wear the reindeer herding hat again because it really did keep my ears warm, I’ll guarantee you this. I will refuse to look cute in it!

It’ll be alright…really.

Listen…it’s going to be alright. Honest it will. It’s not your fault and you’ll get through this. It wasn’t that long ago I went through it myself. Well…OK…maybe it was that long ago, but I got through it and so will you. I promise. This “being young” thing will be over soon enough. Just hang in there. Sure, you feel indestructible now, but it’ll pass. Really…it will. I know what it was like when I thought I could change the world. I also know you’ll get over it just like I did. And right now I know you think you’ll be thin and athletic forever. Trust me the weight will come and the speed will go. You just have to believe. Before you know it the day will dawn when you’ll actually feel vulnerable and you’ll experience your first worry. I promise…it’ll happen. Even though…I know… you feel those days will never come. They will. You’ll feel responsible, you’ll take care…you will get over this “being young” phase. Like I said it’s not your fault. It’s just when you happened to be born. Someday, I promise, you’ll look back through your bifocals and think…I made it through. I really did. And you’ll never have to experience that “being young” thing again. And you know what else? That too…will be alright.

Hey...no big deal.

Hey…if you’ve got other things to do please feel free to let this one slide on by. It’s no big deal. I just want to get a couple of things that have been bugging me off my chest. Let’s start with something I hear a lot among the younger folk. Let’s start with…verse. When did "versus" become "verse"? It’s the Packers "versus" the Patriots…not the Packers "verse" the Patriots. And here’s another one that I hear all the time. When did “by accident” become “on accident”? It happened “by accident”…it didn’t happen” on accident”. Sorry, but it didn’t! Which brings me to turn signals and the lack of use of said mechanisms to let us other folk know what the heck that non user is going to do. It’s done mostly by people who are much too busy using their phones. Wait though…maybe I’m missing something here. You know, I’ll bet they don’t use their turn signals because with one hand on their phone… they would have to take that other hand off the steering wheel to use the turn signal. And that just wouldn’t be safe…would it? And finally for today, to all you hockey fans who bang on the glass when the play gets close…just what the hell is that all about? I think that’s really all I want to say about that. And I’ll save people who walk beside their grocery cart…and not behind it for another day.

The Trail

As we live our lives we all leave a trail behind. A trail that bends and winds up, down and around the years…through darkness and light…calm and storm and on occasion over more than one cliff. A trail that takes its direction from choices made or not made, road signs seen or missed and chances taken or lost. A trail that has led us all to the place we are… right here and right now. So, what was it that determined the trail I took…what were the events that steered my course…what does the trail I’ve left behind so far look like? If I stop, turn and look, what will I see? Not that I can do anything about anything now. I’m here…in this place…at this time. Looking back through the fog of time though, I can see a trail that is littered with quite a few “What ifs” and “Might have beens”. I can see a trail that I sometimes blindly charged down, flying past roads I never gave a thought to taking. I can see a trail stained with more than a few tears from damage done to me…and by me. If I could do it over again would my choice of trails to take be the same? I’ll never know, but maybe…just maybe, by taking a moment to stop and look back down my crooked trail, I will move forward with a softer, more thoughtful step.

Autumn?

The other day I found myself thinking about…well…me. Which I have been known to do now and again. On that particular day though, I found myself thinking about the fact that I have now lived longer than I’m going to live. I have more days behind me than I do ahead of me. And that’s OK. Really! In fact it’s kind of cool. The days I have lived so far have given me so much. Sure there have been some tough ones along the way. It certainly hasn’t all been sweetness and light, but all in all, the journey so far has been pretty good. All those days past have added up to a wisdom and a confidence that only that many days can teach. I have a manuscript of memories, both good and not so good, that took that many days to write. I have a best friendship that has taken that many days of marriage to develop. All those days past have earned me the title of Grandpa…which I cherish. I have now lived longer than I’m going to live and that’s OK. If this is the Autumn of my life…it’s my favorite season so far. If it’s all right with you though, I’d prefer that the younger backs rake the leaves.

Bird Feat

There is a rather large hawk that will sometimes spend part of its afternoon lording over his…or her…domain from a low hanging branch on a big, old, oak tree in the corner of our backyard. That’s what hawks do in their royal hawkiness you know…they lord over domains. It will sit there, dignified and proper…quite handsome really with not a feather out of place. All in all a fine looking hawk, probably a nice enough hawk, unless you happen to be a field mouse, ground hog or a bunny. Then I suppose you might have a different opinion. Because along with the lording over stuff you know he or she is looking for some lunchables. On this particular afternoon, I really don’t know what the crow was thinking or not thinking as it calmly, though obviously distractedly, cruised in for a landing…on that very same branch currently occupied by said large hawk. Now, I couldn’t really see the look on its face as the crow suddenly realized that it was in a…well…interesting situation, but let me just say this. If you’ve never seen a crow try to make a mid-air, all out panic stop while at the same time attempting a 180 degree, reverse curl, triple salchow, death defying spin-a-rama…you must put this sight on your bucket list. And even though a change of feathers was surely necessary, it remains truly one of the greatest aerodynamic feats of birddom ever seen.

The Declaration

OK folks…important stuff here. I have just heard…are you ready for this? I have just heard…this very afternoon…the declaration of the century. OK…maybe not of the century. Let’s call it the declaration of a lifetime. Ok…so it’s only a two and half year old lifetime. It’s still a pretty darn big deal. “Gwampa…I went peepee in the potty!” Told you didn’t I? The declaration of a two and a half year old little boy’s lifetime. A destiny of diapers turns incredibly into a universe of undies. “Gwampa…I went peepee in the potty!” Now just imagine the possibilities. Dresser drawers overflowing with Superman undies…Spiderman big boy underpants…Cookie Monster and Buzz Lightyear…Burt on the front and Ernie bringing up the rear. “Gwampa…I went peepee in the potty!” Truly a life changing moment. Will there be setbacks? Just as in any great “movement”…of course. From now on though, the meaning of “Here we go” will never be the same again. “Gwampa…I went peepee in the potty!” OK…so it’s not “We the People…” it’s still a pretty amazing declaration.